film-slate

Pet Peeve of the Week

Subject: Disruptive Movie-goers

I am a big fan of going out to the movies. I think it’s a great way to de-stress after a long day/week/month. There’s nothing more relaxing than letting your thoughts melt away as you get absorbed into the qualms of fictional characters. Unfortunately, this lovely experience is easily disrupted by disrespectful viewers. And so, this week I am ranting about the annoying behaviour I have encountered at the theatre:

I’m trying to enjoy the show, but these CLOWNS keep ruining it for me!

1. The Obvious – Talking & Texting:

Common movie etiquette asks that we not speak during the movie, and that we turn our cell phones onto silent. It doesn’t seem like too much to ask for, but some movie-goers just can’t seem to get it right.

Right: Whispering a brief comment to the person next to you during a loud musical interlude.
Wrong: Loudly asking, “Who is that guy? Why did he shoot that woman? What’s going on?” – If you’re confused, just please wait it out. Most likely, the plot will reveal itself and all will make sense. And even if it doesn’t, the internet will be able to explain. So shut up and Google it later.

Dr. Evil knows what’s up.

Right: Turning off your cell phone ringer and leaving it in your purse or pocket.
Wrong: Turning off your cell phone ringer and texting everyone you know during the movie. Unless someone is having an emergency, I see no reason to text during the film. Not only is the screen light blinding in the blackened theatre, but the person on the other end probably doesn’t care about the surprise twist to the movie they aren’t watching.

2. Pre-view Pandemonium:

When I go to a movie, I always make sure that I am there far enough ahead of time to get a good seat and get settled. I am always ready by the time the lights dim and the pre-views come on. When I went to see a new movie on the first ‘Cheap Tuesday’ that it was showing, I knew I had to be there half an hour early to avoid sitting in the front row. Unfortunately, the couple who walked in during the third preview didn’t have that common sense. It’s a full theatre and you’re late, stop standing in front of the screen, craning your necks trying to find prime seating. Take your (deserved) walk of shame to the front row and sit where you belong.

3. Preteen Playground:

The movies are, unfortunately, a breeding ground for disruptive youngins’. When you’re the age in between Princess Parties and Keggers, the movies seem like a safe option for parents. And so, twenty dollars are awarded, and twenty 14 year olds pile into the theatre. Let’s face it: they don’t want to be there. I don’t want them to be there. So parents, just let them play spin the bottle in the basement. It will keep them out of my hair, and save you some money. Sure, innocence may be spared, but it’s worth it in my eyes.

Seriously, keep those hormone-crazed kids at home!

4. The Complainer:

Recently, I went to the theatre to see a romantic comedy. (Yes, my Pet Peeves seem aggressive, but I’m a sucker for a quirky love story, sue me.) When I picked the movie, I knew what I was signing up for. So, this is directed to the man who complained that he was *cue deep, gruff voice* “pissed that he ended up at a chick flick”. Did you really think that the movie who’s poster has a man and a woman staring longingly into each other’s eyes was going to be an action-thriller? Just go see Cowboys and Aliens if all you want is questionable plot and lots of explosions. Stop chirping my choice and let me silently swoon as clichés unfold on the screen and love overcomes obstacles.

Next time, opt for the OBVIOUS action-thriller. And take my boyfriend with you!

**All photos courtesy of Google.

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