Jess concert

Would you go to a concert alone?

Picture this. You walk into a concert venue. You flash your ticket or pick up your pass at the door. You grab a drink and begin sipping it outside or inside the space. When the music starts, you edge your way up near the front or find your seat. You watch the show, while every other concertgoer and group stares in disgust or pity – debating whether to befriend you, just so you shouldn’t have to endure the pain of watching this musical artist alone. Awful, right?

Wrong. Quite wrong. Well, up until the onlookers part.

As a music writer and publicist, and, obviously, just a music fan – I’ve come to know and embrace the idea of going to a concert alone. For so long, I would drag boyfriend or friend with me to every show – mainly because if I was reviewing it, I needed to go. Or, if I loved the band – again, I just needed to go. And going alone sounded silly.

Then, as the shows piled up and my evenings quickly filled with tour dates that couldn’t be missed – one by one, I mentally braved the idea of attending alone every now and again. Not because I couldn’t force someone to be my plus one (who doesn’t want a free ride to catch some live music?) but because the idea just actually wasn’t so scary, and I kind of began to like it. I love music; I would inevitably love the display; I also wouldn’t have to make a big weeknight occasion out of something I didn’t want to. To make the feat easier at first, I reminded myself that the chances of bumping into an industry colleague were high. So, what was the harm in standing solo?

A show is probably (in my mind) one of the most fantastic ways to spend a night out with friends or colleagues. So, yes, I’m totally aware of the fact that, unlike going to the movies or shopping – it really is a social outing that could very easily involve drinks and aftermath. But, similar to the movies, the fear of going alone really comes back to caring what people think of you. And, since kindergarten and after-school specials, we’ve been taught that’s a very toxic care to have.

If no one else could see that you were alone – or if you even just had a decoy friend to stand near – would you care as much? Although sharing a reaffirming “Wow, this is awesome” glance is always nice – don’t get me wrong – you’re not going to be talking very much during the performance anyway. If I decided to sit out a concert simply because of a potential bruised ego, I know that sitting at home, flipping through Twitter and Instagram where snapshots of said show light up before my eyes – I would find myself less than pleased. Witnessing the music, and having the experience, should be what matters.

I’m not saying I’m any more comfortable or confident than the next gal, because surely I am not.  I’m only saying that if you decide to do anything you want to do – even if it means being alone – you’re actually not alone at all. You might just think you are. So, I would hope that next time, you go anyway – and that you have a fabulous time.

 What do you think? Does going to a show alone sound mortifying?

7 Comments

  1. I would totally go to a concert alone. I also go to the movies alone. No one will care but you!

  2. Kaylee Pare says:

    Totally agree! I must go to the movies alone one of these days…but for me, concerts must always include a little (or a lot) of JH. PS – Hilarious cover photo

  3. All things are more fun with you, ma cherie! x

  4. kevin kitts says:

    You certainly do stand out at a concert, Bonz.
    Speaking for myself, I would never go to a concert alone.
    I mean has no one heard of abductions by aliens…..from concerts!
    The only way that I would feel totally comfortable at a concert would be in the presence of my beautiful daughter, Catlink, and her beautiful concert-knowledgeable friend, The Bonz.
    Body-snatching aliens beware with those two by my side.
    By the way, as an attendee at said concert, I would insist on body-surfing……….Yahoo!

  5. kevin kitts says:

    HA, HA, HA In a Nutshell readers…..just kidding you.
    If the concert took place beside a lake, well then, perhaps but I feel confident that you all saw through my little joke in the previous comment and understood that what I was actually saying was, “I would insist on crowd-surfing……….Yahoo!”.

  6. kevin kitts says:

    Does anyone know what “awaiting moderation” means.

  7. Sai Krishna says:

    I am going to try this. Thanks for the encouragement, I need to learn to enjoy myself alone in public, that didn’t quite come out right, but you know what I mean. :)

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