Subject: Inconsiderate Drivers (Part 2)

Well folks, as some of you may know, I recently became the proud owner of my first car. As wonderful as that is, it has provided me the luxury/burden of driving much more frequently. And while it’s amazing to take off, without having to negotiate permission to borrow someone else’s wheels, spending more time on the road means spending more time with inconsiderate drivers who cause me to lose my mind.

I’ve gone off on this topic before, referring to those who don’t use turn signals, wait until the last moment to merge and don’t wave when I let them in. These offences are heinous, but over the past little while, a few other types of inconsiderate behaviour has really grinded my gears…

1. Taking up more than one parking space:

This offence is common in any large parking lot. There’s always some jerk who feels that in order to protect their precious vehicle, they should simply park on an angle and take up multiple spaces. Now, some people are just brutal at parking and their crookedness in unintentional. Those people are annoying, but nowhere NEAR as annoying as those who do it intentionally. The problem is, these people always manage to take up two spaces near the store. They never want to make the extra 3 minute walk and park away from other cars, because obviously that’s a ridiculous thought.

And what’s worse is that often these intentional crooked parkers aren’t even driving nice cars! If you have a Ferrari, fine, I get it – nice car. But then WHY are you shopping at Walmart? And if it’s not nice? Sorry, but I don’t see why you’re so concerned about protecting your 1978 beater that is being held together with duct tape. The duct tape is literally worth more than the vehicle. God forbid somebody puts a dent in the one piece of metal that’s not already rusted on your door…

2. The I-Have-To-Get-There-Fast-So-I’ll-Tailgate-You-And-Then-Slow-Down-As-Soon-As-You-Let-Me-Pass-You Jackass:

Often I wonder about these inconsiderate drivers. What went so wrong in their childhoods that their need for attention causes them to tailgate (dangerous), abruptly pass you (reckless), and then slow down to a lesser speed than what you were going in the first place (inconsiderate/mind blowing)? My only theory is that these people MUST just be attention seekers with a slight Napoleon complex. Whatever the reason, I’m annoyed and you’re an idiot.

3. Aggressive honking:

If I’m stalled at a green light, I feel like I deserve to get a brisk honk. From time to time, our minds inevitably wander as we sit at red lights (no Mom, I swear I’m NOT texting). It happens to the best of us. Please don’t barrel down on your horn as if I’ve stolen your child and you’re trying to alert the world. I get it, I made a small error, let it go. Seriously.

Furthermore, why do people honk for no reason during traffic? WHAT GOOD DOES THAT DO? It’s called gridlock people. And while I literally can’t wrap my head around who’s at the beginning of the traffic causing the slowdowns every day (seriously, it’s an enigma), I certainly don’t think that blaring my horn is going to open up a magic tunnel that will let me speed past all my fellow drivers. Aggressive honking is annoying and it’s interrupting me singing along to Carly Rae Jepsen… which is NOT okay. #dontcallmeever